Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Fuck That Movie!

Yesterday, I took the liberty of treating myself to a movie....alone. Most people would view that as a sad, pathetic, and incredibly loserish act. Not I. I bought myself popcorn, sat in the middle of the row, kicked my feet up and watched the Will Smith blockbuster I Am Legend. Fuck that movie! Okay, although it was a well-made movie, I went in having absolutely no idea what to expect. I was under the preconceived notion that this movie was about a man wandering the desolate streets of New York. Nope! Suddenly zombies kept popping up to and fro scaring the bejesus out of me. Fuck that movie! I spilt my popcorn twice, covered my eyes, and nearly wet myself. Fine, I admit the damn movie has been out for a solid 3 months, so I should have known better. But in my defense, the combination of a cute dog and an A-List star has always proved wholesome and delightful for me (et al. Tom Hanks in You've Got Mail, the upcoming Marley & Me with Owen Wilson, Legally Blonde!). Not I Am Legend. Fuck That Movie! Thereafter, the nightmares ensued, the zombie faces haunted me in my bedroom, and don't even get me started on that poor dog.

Fuck. That. Movie.

P.S. I give it 3 1/2 stars...

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